I seem to seek even more solitude than ever before. I can't recall being this hostile against humanity ever before. Cause I can't even stand talking to my mom on the phone, or anyone else for that matter. I can't stand having company for more than a few minutes, all I want is to be left alone. I don't know why, but I retreat as much as possible, don't want anything to do with the world anymore. It could go up in flames and disappear and I wouldn't notice, wouldn't care.
I was once like an open book, always wanting to tell everyone about my amazing, boring life. Well I still am, virtually, but not behind the computer. If you'd call me I'd probably say something vague about my general situation, hiding my true emotions and thoughts. You might hear me smoking a cigarette and or sipping from a glass in the long silences between the exchange of words. Just waiting to hang up cause I have nothing to say, nothing that I want to say. And if I have to, I'd lie to end the conversation. Say that I have to eat, go to the bathroom or that some guy is killing my character in WoW. I live in solitude, and I like it that way.
No comments:
Post a Comment