I hate food and eating

I wish I was a snake. Then I would only have to eat one giant meal like once a week and then not have to think about food until the next time. I basically do that already, but my human body seem to disagree with that solution. I also wish that I could be a carnivore and not have to eat anything other than meat. I basically do that already too, but a full meat-only diet wouldn't agree with my body either. Or better yet, I wish I didn't have to eat at all.

I'm hungry. I'm cranky, and I feel disgusted when thinking about food. You know that thing you do with your upper lip when you think of something disgusting? Yeah, I can't seem to get that expression off my face right now, thinking about food, even in the most general sense. What the hell should I do!?

I've tried several different techniques, one worse than the other:
1. Ignoring it. Usually works for about a couple of hours, then follows stomachache, nausea, headache, fatigue and concentration diffuculties. Wait long enough and I'll pass out.
2. Take the first thing I find in the fridge, close my eyes, nose and shove it into my mouth. Usually ends in puking or nearly puking, feeling even more disgusted and going for technique 1.
3. Concentrate and try to figure out something that might not be all too revolting, that is available in my kitchen. Usually ends with me not finding such a thing, leading to either technique 1 or 2.
4. Decide to skip the food and drink a lot of milk, tea, juice, coffee or whatever is handy instead. Usually works for a few hours, then leading to the same effects as with technique 1.

I wish food wasn't such an obsticle for me. Why can't I enjoy it? Why do I feel sick and disgusted near food when I'm hungry? It should be easier for me to lose weight than this. It's just that my body absorbs the tiny little I eat as if it was ten times more. So maybe this is the way it should be for me. Cause if I had a bigger (or any at all) apetite, I'd be fat. But experiencing eating and food as an evil necessity almost all the damn time, just isn't fun.

I feel like going into my kitchen and just throw all the damn food out of the fucking window. So sick of it all! If only starvation was an option.