My thought process is a little better today. That's something at least. I had a dream tonight, in which I told my parents I was never gonna have a child due to the surgeries I wanted, and a single tear fell down my cheek. It was a very visual and emotional dream. I can't do it! I just can't get that bottom surgery! Why does this have be so hard? Hm.. I know I don't really need to worry about that just yet.
Then I woke up from the sound of my family talking in other rooms of the house, though it didn't sound like them. Terrified that they had been replaced by imposters I clinged to my duvet when my mom opened the door to my room. She seemed like my real mom, and told me my sister had a friend over. I managed to stay out of sight of them until her friend went.
I'm very asocial today. Just wanna avoid everyone, even my family. It's likely I will go back home to my apartment tomorrow or the day after. Just wanna be by myself again.
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