Managing pain

The only way I can deal with pain is by inflicting pain: on myself and on others, and by letting others inflict pain on me. Pain is my life.

Read a bit in the forum threads on Safe Haven and miss read something as 'sick fuck' and instantly felt like listening to Unter Null. I had almost forgotten how good her music is.

I have this horrible headache. Found a few Citodon pills lying around in my apartment along with some Paraflex, so I took one of each a couple of hours ago. (Paraflex is muscle relaxing, which is great for pain caused by tensions). The first hour I was just waiting for the effect to kick in and couldn't understand why it didn't. Until I remembered they don't work without food. Damnit! I feel extra disgusted by food today so I was mildly frustrated as I rifled through the fridge for something eadible. Eventually decided for a miniature porton of fruit yoghurt, asking Anna if she thought that could be enough. Worth a try, at least. And... it worked!

So I'm sitting here tripping on codein right now... woah! I remember OD'ing on these quite frequently back in the days during the second winter in 2010. They're not so effective as a painkiller though, my headache is still rather horrible, but at least they make the pain funnier! C'OD'ing!

Not many painkillers are effective on me. I've tried all sorts of kinds but Citodon is the strongest I've tried. And it barely takes the edge of it. Good thing my headaches are manageable most of the time! Otherwise I would be fucking hospitalized, or tripping on morphine 24/7. At least it's not that bad, I mean.