The only comfort I want and feel the need for right now is a picture on my cell phone screen. I guess I don't even have to say whose by now.
Finally trying to get something edible inside me now, as Ica had finally opened so I could go buy a diet shake. It's better than nothing at least.
I noticed that I had worked out a little yesterday, my thighs and upper arms are a bit sore. Feels good in a way. But then the rest of me hurts like hell as well, but for various reasons such as sitting idle on a chair for nearly 66 hours straight, except for 3 walks and that little work out. Then there's the headache, being hungry for several hours, tensed here and there, my feet cold to the point of hurting and my hands hurt from all the typing. So yeah, every little inch of me is covered in pain. Even my ears from wearing head phones all the time...
Aside from that, I think I'm feeling a little better now. Taking my mind off all this distress with meaningless lists to fill in, a movie and an episode of "Angel" did the trick. And daylight. A fresh start, the time of the day when I don't have to feel like shit cause I can't sleep. I take one night at a time, and let go during the day.
This is so absurd! I can't believe that nights equal anxiety and days equal relief. In my world I'm so used to it being the other way around; with peaceful, enchanting, beautiful nights and stressful, awfully bright, annoying days. That although I know myself so well, I'm still able to surprise myself. But it's good that at least some part of the day makes me feel a little lighter at heart.
The crew just called for my morning meds and I told them I was still awake. Doubt they knew I meant since 3 days ago...
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