One year post op

I've noticed that if my shirts and sweaters aren't completely flat at the front I get a nagging feeling that it looks like I have boobs. It's very annoying and I try to flatten it out. It's worst when I sit down a little hunched over, as I almost always sit, because of my posture. So yeah... I still get some kind of dysphoria concerning my chest even though I am post op.

About that, it was my one year anniversary on being post op a couple of weeks ago (March 10th) and I completely forgot taking pictures of my chest and writing an update. So I guess I can just whip something up right now.

So, it's been healing great, although a little slow, since the scars are still very visible on my pale skin, they are mostly pink and a little purple at some places. They're very uneven because of how the stitches were placed, but not very wide. Around a few millimetres, and maybe 5-6 millimetres at the widest.

I do have sensation in my nipples despite not wanting that and choosing an operation technique that should have killed my sensation there. It's a dulled sensation, and I only feel it upon pressure. Otherwise, I have almost full sensation in the whole area, except from directly on the scars.

You can't see any scarring around the nipples, although they are very weird in colour. Darker around and very light in the middle. I have no idea why that is, but it could be because the healing process took much longer in the middle than at the edges.

What more to say about it? Oh yes, the whole area is not as "puffy" as it was right after the operation and the scars are now much softer. Not much has happened though, during the last 4 or 5 months or so. Now I'm just waiting for the scars to get even lighter in time and I might start using zinc paste on them again, as it bleaches scarring in a safe way. Very safe, trust me.

Also, I'm getting all the more hairy on my chest, that for some random reason started just a few months after the operation. I doubt it's actually related though. I have weird hairs growing where my nipples used to be, which is right above the scars. I think it looks kinda weird, haha, so I usually shave that off. But I keep the hair on the middle of my chest that connects with my happy trail and well, yeah. It goes all the way down.

Always when I start talking about my post op result I get into talking about the changes of testosterone too. Is that even interesting, after 1 plus 1,5 years on it? Right now, it's not that much happening anymore, just that I continue to get hairier in surprising places. Including my facial hair, which is slowly filling out more to the cheeks but still hasn't reached my upper lip. No idea why that seems to come last for me, as it seems to come first for most transguys.

Anyway, that should do for an update. I don't want to go on ranting about this forever. I'll probably update about it again if or when I go off testosterone for trying to have a child. But probably not before then.