Somehow something made me think of a story I once heard online about a guy who managed to get orgasms from having his thumb stimulated. However he was pretty desperate to find any way at all though, cause his nether regions were practically dead due to... er think it was paralysed or spinal chord injury, I don't remember exactly but no part of his lower body was working however, so he had to get creative. And it did make me smile a bit knowing he actually did find a way. That's kinda sweet.
Yeah I actually have thought about things like how people with various physical disabilities do it. Not just cause of general curiosity though, but because I don't want to believe that they can't get to have that at all. I want to know that it can work for them somehow. And also because I have been with a physically disabled person myself, of course it's more than once crossed my mind after that, that I wouldn't say no to being with a person for the reason of them being disabled if I wanted to be with them cause I'm attracted to them and/or in love with them. So of course it's of interest to me how it could be like in that aspect for people who don't have it as easy as I do.
Well technically I've been with two people with noticeable/apparent physical disabilities. Both very different people, both having very different disabilities. Really the only thing they had in common was they were both cis men. One of them, the first one, I'm not sure exactly what his condition was but as far I know I would guess my way somewhere along the lines of muscle atrophy. I knew it was something he was born with that it wasn't curable or treatable. He was in a wheelchair and had quite a lot of control over his neck and head, face and such, and some-to-little control over his arms and hands but that was about it. He was very thin and his fingers curled up in what looked like an uncomfortable position. Nothing wrong with his equipment though... and damn he was hot and being with him was hot. I still wish I had kept in contact with him, but I was a mess at the time and could barely even keep in contact with myself.
The other guy I was with had a slight a brain damage (also since birth) which didn't affect his intelligence or personality, but it did affect his nervous system. It was noticeable in the way that he really did shake a lot, especially when he was nervous. I mean it wasn't just the regular kind of shaking a typical person could experience every now and then, it certainly stood out. More like a very constant and erratic kind of tic, or shivering extremely much when being very cold. I don't think I could describe it better than that. He told me that drinking alcohol helped him with that condition and he had brought beer with him when he visited me. He did spill quite a lot of it where we sat as he was still sober, but I didn't care about how much of his beer ended up on my couch. I was more concerned with trying to make him feel more comfortable with me, which wasn't all that hard actually. A little more beer and excitement later, he did shake a lot less and I even forgot about it somewhere in our passion.
However I don't particularly like saying lots of stuff about other people that I've been sexual with in terms of what kind of ailments they had. It feels like it looks like I'm somehow glorifying it or feeling proud over how unbiased I am and other stuff that makes me want to cringe. No, I was with them because 1) they were hot 2) I was horny 3) we both wanted to fuck each other 4) I didn't care whether or not they had that ailment, only in terms of what they could or couldn't do and what I could do to help to make things go smoother and so we both would have a great time.
Not all that many people that I know even know about this stuff about me. I'm sure not even my mother does, but only cause I never had a reason to tell her and she never asked, or most of anyone else. It's not like I go around and brag about it. Although I'm far from ashamed either. I like holding onto those memories cause I had a great time with nice people. Which was a kinda rare occurrence when it comes to my sex life in the past. However of course I've had very great times with other people too, but it would be a lie to say that these two men don't stand out from my other sexual encounters. But it was nothing but positive experiences for me. It didn't weird me out or made me feel more awkward than I normally always am in such situations. In fact for some reason I felt more safe with them than any other casual sex partner I've had.
That could be a thing though, actually. That I do tend to feel more safe when I'm with someone who has a disability that is prominent/noticeable, because I don't feel like they're as likely to take advantage of or abuse me. I think it could be either because of them being aware of that maybe they don't feel as wanted or appreciated, which I did get a strong impression of from both of them (however I certainly did want and appreciated them and I wanted for them to know/feel that), and also that they wouldn't be physically capable of attacking me, but that one goes for the first guy, not the second.
I also tend to feel like it's easier for me to be myself more openly when I'm with people who are more on the unconventional side, like if I'm with someone who is more or less "normal" I tend to feel like I have to try and pass off as "normal" too which does cause a lot of stress and insecurity for me. Then that doesn't really matter in what way they're unconventional though. So well, in both those regards, I think I understand why I was so relaxed and felt safe in their company, leading to great sex.
I know I wouldn't say no to being with someone because of them having some kind of disability, as long as we're into each other and we could make it work. But I don't think I would go looking for people in that category either, as that doesn't quite sit right with me. It's more of an if we meet and hit off well, then what's stopping us, kinda thing. I wouldn't consider it to be a turn-on for me, but it's not a turn-off either. It just is.
Yeah I usually don't go around and talk about stuff like this, however I call this blog a public diary for a reason. It's literally me making parts of my diary public. It's personal, it's meant to be. Reading it means you get to see what I don't talk about in public. Then it's up to you whatever you choose to do with the information.
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