I noticed that my scars are fading, and in March, the 10th, it will have been one year since I had the surgery. It's kind of unreal to me. I will do so much swimming this summer, if the weather allows me to. And if my school class or the LSS will arrange for us to go swimming before then, I will gladly join them. I can definitely do that now.
All I have is two sort of suspicious scars that is just my own private business and I have no obligation to actually tell anyone about how I got them. I could just say "surgery" or "freak accident" or simply "none of your fucking business" and that would be it. Ah, I'm just longing for swimming. And being nervous about it, but heck, I've been forced into women's bathing suits for over a decade before just because of those damn lumps on my chest and the gender marker on my birth certificate, it's not so weird that I'm still a bit nervous about it.
About going out in public shirtless, that is. Whether it's summer and extremely hot, or wearing swim suit shorts at a bathing house. But it's almost been a whole year now although this damn freezing country doesn't allow me to even dress down to just wearing a t-shirt 9 months of the year, I still feel awesome about have done that surgery. Cause honestly, it's not about showing off the result, it's about how it makes me feel. In public under layers of clothing and at home in the the private. With or without other people being present.
I will take new photos of what I will look like in a little more than a month, to compare and to see the progress that far. I'll also update that on Transbucket, or whatever the site is called. There I posted a before picture, 9 days post op and 4 months post op, so it could be interesting comparing that to the 1 year post op picture that I later will take then.
Though it hasn't happened that much these last few months. The scars have gotten paler and I'm slightly hairier on my chest, but that's pretty much it. I've got back a little sensation on my nipples but they mostly just feel weird. Like they hurt easily, but sort internally. Must be some kind of nerve damage. Well, I literally asked for nerve damage, so yeah. Well, I asked for a procedure to lessen the sensation in my nipples, or to completely erase it, so technically that is nerve damage.
Aside from that, I have very little sensation on the scars themselves but otherwise most sensation has returned in the area. Also my nipples are weirdly coloured. The areola, sort of, is kinda dark while it's light pink in the middle. I don't know exactly why they turned out that way but I think it's because the areola healed faster than the nipples themselves, or because of that I ripped of the scabs a little too soon there.
That's like the only thing that sort of bothers me, and how purple my scars still are, but they will get paler with time. Now this has probably nothing to do with it, but I've been thinking if it's possible to get my nipples pierced. Preferably just the right one. I've always wanted that, but I don't know if they're in good enough shape for it, or what to say. I should probably wait another year or so, but it's tempting. I could always ask a piercer about it or something, if he or she or they has any opinion about piercing nipples that have been operated on. Cause I seriously have no idea.
Well, that's my super long 11 months post op update.
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