So, I was in Linköping with my mother on the 26th of September, to see the surgeon I had an appointment with. Yeah I'm posting this a bit later than I first anticipated, but better late than never? I wrote most of this weeks ago, but then I didn't get around to editing and posting. However, I really liked the surgeon, he provided me with lots of information, listened to me, was sensible and kind. I got a lot of my questions and confusion cleared up in just 10 minutes. He told me more detailed information about the surgery and the different stages, such as how they'd go about forming the extension of the urethra with vaginal tissue, that apparently they'll push the upper wall of it upwards somehow and do it that way. As for the clitoral release, no new information for me. And then somewhat shape the scrotum and place in testicular implants but keep it separate until the next stage. By the second stage they'll do vaginectomy and fuse the scrotum together. They can't fuse the scrotum before/without a vaginectomy cause it would cover the hole then, which I also asked about to have clarified, as I got a very confused mental picture of my nether regions that didn't seem entirely logical. It seems in USA a vaginectomy is pretty much expected, but in Sweden it's much more openly optional and you have to request it or they'll assume that you don't want it.
He also said they could do a hysto at the same time (during the first stage) which got me confused cause the other surgeon I spoke to in May said they don't do hysto at the same time as meta. This surgeon thought that was odd as they apparently know each other and my former potential surgeon (Hannes Sigurjohnsson) used to be my now to be surgeon's (Gunnar Kratz) apprentice. Gunnar taught Hannes his techniques! Also, Kratz is not just a skilled SRS surgeon as far as what I've heard, but is like chief/leader over the entire department and has his own private clinic as well. (I don't want to speak ill of Hannes just because I had one bad consultation with him in May, however I do feel much better about Gunnar being my surgeon in the future when it comes to my nether regions. Hannes did a great job with my chest, but it's not the same thing, and require different areas of expertise).
This is exactly what I mean by me not knowing what to expect where, no matter how much online research I do. But I'm glad this surgeon can do the hysto simultaneously (or well not him, but another surgeon brought into the same operating room during the surgery then). However it's not certain it can be arranged like that cause apparently I'll need permission from Gotland's district, and a referral for that sent to him. My mother will help me to figure that out.
So, as far as I know at this point, is it can go one of two ways:
1) I get to have the meta and the hysto done at the same time in about 5 months from now, then have the vaginectomy at a second stage later on...
2) ...or, I'll have the hysto done first in about 1-2 months from now, then have the meta about 3-4 or so months from then, and then have the vaginectomy done a while after that.
I'm hoping for the former, as that seems more convenient and be fewer surgeries/stages (2 instead of 3).
As I'm editing this way later than I first wrote this, I now know that I will get to have the hysto at the same time as the meta. Which does mean more wating until any actual surgery, but more convenient, so I'm not really complaining. So that's how it's gonna be, surgery in 5-ish months from now! Yay!
Other information I got during the meeting was that I'll need to stay at the hospital (after surgery) for about 5 days, but that things will start to get significantly better after around day 3. And yes he did take a look at me as well. It was quick, and it didn't mess me up mentally, other than feeling a bit weird about it. Like he wanted me to pull my junk up and it kinda made me a tad uncomforfortable, but he didn't even touch me. And yes I remembered to inform him about my latex allergy. Good I at least sometimes remember it... He said my junk looked good and there was no problem, that I had "done good", but I said I had just taken testosterone. And then we talked a bit about how effective testo is on trans men compared to estrogen on trans women. We seemed to know about as much about that too, although I misinterpreted him a bit at first. He was really quite chill and both funny and professional at the same time, so I actually managed to feel quite relaxed in his company. These types of meetings tend to make me very nervous and tense otherwise, so I'm glad I didn't feel that way this time.
Unfortunately I don't remember everything said and done at that meeting now, but I'll keep writing things down as they come to me, and I also have my mother as extra memory storage, which was mainly why I brought her with me to that meeting. And as some emotional support, considering how overly nervous I was last time. I really couldn't think properly back then.
Oh! I just remember that he said a Danish guy will do the vaginectomy, so in total there will be 3 different surgeons involved, at least. But not all at once. I've heard he's good too, although I don't remember his name anymore.
It just hit me that I could quite likely be getting my surgery very close to my 29th birthday. That would be an amazing present, indeed. And no, I don't care about possibly being fairly immobile in a hospital bed on my birthday. Birthdays actually don't mean all that much for me. I mean, they're not "sacred" in lack of a better, less religious sounding word. I mean I don't have to celebrate them properly, or even in a pain-free way. Although it could also align more closely with my 4th year anniversary of being post op mastectomy, March 10th. We'll see, and I'll keep you posted, as well as updating on facebook. Just with far less detailed information over there.
I'm not sure how to prepare the practical stuff before my surgery, mostly cause of not knowing for sure what will be asked of me/required, but I've thought of a few things. Like making sure I have lots of clean sweatpants, t-shirts and other softer clothes ready at home/bring with me, as well as buying some looser boxer shorts to wear. (I only have tight boxer-briefs and briefs which I've heard can be uncomfortable to wear while newly post op). Since I plan to stay at my parents' place the initial time after (1-2 weeks), I won't need to prepare my own apartment all that much except from making sure I won't have anything left rotting here. And a clean bed, basically. Clean dishes would be good too. Mother can help me buy more fresh food by then.
As for some non-surgery related updates, I'm kept having some trouble with my ear stretching with that skin reaction/irritation up until a couple of weeks ago. It turned out it was from the black rubber bands I used to keep each jewellery in place, so I replaced them with clear silicone bands which works so far. Last time I sized up was exactly a month ago, September 14th, and today I sized up again, on October 14th, from 2 mm to 2,5 mm. I keep all that stuff written down elsewhere too. It was tricky as hell to get that damn tunnel into my tiny ear hole, but eventually I managed it. Feels like my ear hates me a bit now, but I'm sure it will come around.
I vaguely "plan" to stetch up one size a month, depending on how well my ear handles each process. But as soon as I hear anything about surgery happening soonish next year, I will take a much longer break from the ear stretching process. Just to be sure. Sooo... maybe my next size up will be either in mid November or early December for 3 mm, then January or early February for 3,5 mm, then I don't know. My ultimate goal I'm not quite sure about yet, but probably either 12 or 14 mm most likely. Sure, 13 would be a nice number, but finding neat jewellery in that particular size seems to be quite difficult.
On other stuff, I'm unfortunately back to smoking somewhere around 10 cigarettes a day again (the fucking e-cig got me back to it), but I'll cut back down to zero from sometime around Christmas/New Years. I know I can do it, just not for all that long.
I'm already starting to look forward to all the things I want to do with my life after all the surgeries have healed up. Start working out properly, start practicing karate again, get a cat, maybe try a job or two at some point, try harder to move to Stockholm or nearby area, save up for either driving licence or MC licence, get a proper vehicle for that, save up money for tattoos... the possibilities are endless! (Almost).
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